December 28, 2005

Novocaine for the Soul

Well, if you read Mrs. Big Dubya's Confessions of a Drunk Dialer you would probably have the impression that we are all just a raving bunch of alcoholics who will use any occasion, even one steeped in religious tradition, to get down-right stupid drunk. And, well, you'd be right. Although, I do have to admit that it's usually Mrs. Big Dubya who's the voice of reason in most of these situations. I have heard, on more than one occasion, that it might behoove me to "start taking it easy." I'm just kidding really. It's been a long time since I've seen wifey even the least bit tipsy, let alone hammered enough to start making random phone calls expressing her love and undying friendship punctuated with a "We gotta get together more, man! It's been too long." I did, however, leave a very tall glass of water and a bottle of Excedrin right next to her bed knowing full well that she would be in dire need of both.

Besides our remake of Days of Wine and Roses the quick trip back to Boston was quite enjoyable even if other family members do their best to fuck things up. Lesson learned: nailing down plans for Christmas in October are useless and will be thwarted on Christmas Eve necessitating a mad scramble so as to not inconvenience others. Fuck. I hate being the oldest and most accommodating. New Year's resolution: I will be more of a dick. Hmmph, I don't think that one will be hard to keep.

But, Christmas was a blast with Little Dub and that's really what it's all about, right? He got tons of outfits (have I mentioned he has a better wardrobe than I?) and plenty of toys, although I think we could have just wrapped some boxes filled with tissue paper and gotten the same reactions. I can't wait until he's old enough to understand it all a little better and get into it more.

And, I have to admit, I was spoiled as well. Mrs. Big Dubya hooked a brother up with the Dell DJ 30GB, a sweet Red Sox microfleece, a Mr. Potato Head Safari set (yes, I do know I'm 38. What's your point?) and Star Wars Battlefront II for Xbox. She was also instrumental in encouraging my sister-in-law to purchase this on behalf of my goddaughter.

Since I have a player now, lemme offer a playlist that came up randomly this morning while getting a root canal - I'm positive that should you find yourslef in a similar situation, this will ocme in handy:

I Believe in a thing Called Love - Darkness
Shoot to Thrill - AC/DC
Kick Out the Jams - Bad Brains and Henry Rollins
A Little Less Conversation (JXL Remix) - Elvis Presley
Shamrocks and Shenanigans - House of Pain (apropos, no?)
Let's Get It On - Jack Black (almost started laughing)
Bring the Noise - Public Enemy
Under Pressure - The Used
Bound for the Floor - Local H
Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Ice Cube/Mack 10 (Clash tribute disc)
Religion - Front 242
Rock the House - Gorrilaz

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December 24, 2005

Have yourself a merry little Christmas

I spoke to soon. Yesterday, I was all set to end the run of Mr. Big Dubya's Bloggers' Mantel&trade only to find a card from Laura K. over at Sebastian's Space in my inbox. Now, don't make a liar out of me -- this is it. Finito. You all should have better things to do than to send me pictures. Before I get to the final card of the season, allow me to thank Dutch at Blogging baby who hooked me up yesterday with a little blurb about The Mantel - you can see Dutch & Wood's daughter, Juniper, in yesterday's edition.

So, for really the last time, here's the Yule:



And, here's the card:



Merry Christmas, everyone! See you in a few days.

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December 23, 2005

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!

Here we are, the Friday before Christmas and it certainly looks like things are winding down for Mr. Big Dubya's Bloggers' Mantel&trade. But not before I add one more to the collection. My friend Dutch at SweetJuniper was kind enough to send along a card from him and Wood. I'd like to thank everyone that participated in, what I hope, will be an annual tradition here at Mr. Big Dubya. It will be great to watch as everyone's children (regretfully) get older.

So, for what looks like the last time, I bring you the Yule Log in all its glory:



And, now, Sweet Juniper:



Ok, one last pic. Remember, he sees you when you're sleeping.

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December 22, 2005

Sending Christmas Cards

It appears the mailman got his truck righted and was able to continue on his route since I received two more cards in this morning's post. Queen of Spain and The Kidlet Chronicles were kind enough to send along their holiday wishes. There are still three days left until Christmas so there's plenty of time to fill a spot on Mr. Big Dubya's Bloggers' Mantel&trade.

As usual, the fire. Heh, heh he said fire.



Now, your holiday wishes:



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December 21, 2005

Apparently, the mailman has been tipping them back

I think the mailman got stuck in a ditch since I didn't receive any pictures in my overnight delivery. Suburban Misfit got her entry to me in the late morning drop-off yesterday. I had hoped to include her with some others, but, unfortunately, there were none. C'est la vie. She'll get the post to herself today I guess. So, without further ado, I give you Christopher and Sofia of Suburban Misfit fame.

But, first, the burning pieces of wood:



And now, the card:



If you want to join the others on Mr. Big Dubya's Bloggers' Mantel&trade, there's still time - just send an e-mail along with your picture to: Mr. Big Dubya before Christmas morning.

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December 20, 2005

Gather 'round the Yule Log

Space is sure getting tight on Mr. Big Dubya's Bloggers' Mantel&trade. But there's still time for you to get your picture cards in - just send them over to mr. big dubya at gmail.com and I will make sure to get them up as soon as possible. Now, let's see whose cards arrived in the morning mail, shall we?

First, you gotta have the Log:



Then we have cards from Misfit Hausfrau, M & Co. at My Own Circle of Confusion and CroutonBoy at Cheeky's Hideaway. And, oh yeah, we have Little Dub's official card up on the mantel now that most people should have received it. So, without any further ado:



And, for your uber-cute moment of the day. Hey, this is my mantel, dammit!

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December 19, 2005

Chim chiminey, chim chiminey, chim chim che-ree!

If you popped over to Mrs. Big Dubya yesterday, you would have read about her harrowing quest to find stocking holders. Some of you might have asked yourselves, "Why didn't you have any already?" Well, we never really had any need for them. Sure, we've had stockings, but never ones that were "just ours." They were very impersonal and generic. I have the one my grandmother knit 30-some-odd years ago (she made them for the entire family), but it didn't seem appropriate to use it if Mrs. Big Dubya didn't have one for herself. But, now, with Little Dub in the house, these kinds of things carry more weight and more significance, so we bought three stockings, had them monogrammed and now they are hung by the chimney with care. Yes, I did venture to the "lifeguardless gene pool" that is K-Mart and I'll swear that in place of Frosty the Snowman or Silver Bells, I heard Dueling Banjos. Needless to say, I didn't hang around for very long and made a hasty retreat after securing said holders. If you sit in K-Mart long enough, will you see every Jeff Foxworthy joke in person? Just asking.

Wrapped (heh) up my shopping yesterday and in the process the less-patient side of me came out to play. As I've said here on more than one occasion, I'm a pretty laid back kind of guy. But, yesterday for some reason, my patience for people was very thin. I was waiting at the counter to return some items when an older woman brusquely came up next to me and placed her bag on the counter as well, right on top of my bag. Now, usually, this would have elicited a stare, maybe some grumbling and a dramatic grabbing of my parcel (get your mind out of the gutter). However, I felt the need to bitch-slap this woman with a healthy dose of sarcasm. "Am I in your way?" I asked. "Excuse me?" she replied.

"I asked if I was in your way. I mean, I am standing here at the corner of this counter with a return right in front of me. So, I was just curious as to whether I was infringing on your space."

"No."

"Maybe your bag is too heavy? Maybe after bringing it into the store from your car you couldn't go another step and just had to place it down?"

"No. I'm just waiting in line."

"No. You're not. You're co-opting my space in line. I'm here, I'm being waited on and now you are acting as though you are entitled to this part of the counter. Now, isn't that just a little bit rude?" One service desk clerk is now watching and listening to the conversation.

"Well, I'd say your rude," she said with a touch of indignation. I'll swear I heard her say Harumph.

"And, that's where you would be mistaken. Like I said. I'm here. I was here before you entered the store. You have entered into my personal space and thrown your bag of returns onto my own. All I asked you to answer was if I was in your way. You haven't answered the question, so I can only assume you are inconsiderate and rude." This was my last salvo as the clerk who had been listening called the woman to her register.

"Well....," she tried to reply but she had nothing.

"Happy Holidays," I said as she made her way to the other register.

My work here was done.

So, I have another blogger who has graciously decided to participate in Mr. Big Dubya's Bloggers' Mantel™. Today, Friday Playdate will take their spot next to Cape Buffalo, Child's Play and The Goon Squad up on the mantel.

First, the Yule Log:


And, now the card:

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December 16, 2005

Later on we'll conspire as we dream by the fire

In a post a few weeks ago CroutonBoy bemoaned the tradition of the family photo Christmas card. We all get them and, like Tony, we all struggle with what to do with them once we have them. Save 'em? Toss 'em?

Well, I'm giving everyone an out. I have a meme everyone can play and all it takes is for you to send me an e-mail with your Christmas card picture. I post them here for the blogosphere to see - no postage necessary. No one has to make any kind of decisions on what to do with it later - click! they're on to another site. And here, they even get a roaring fire to go with it for added effect.

So - take a minute and find your best, worst, cutest or just plain hysterical holiday pic and send it on over.

First, the Yule Log:


And our most recent delivery:

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December 14, 2005

The Blogosphere's Sub-Zero

Well, a couple of bloggers have taken me up on my offer to be the refrigerator of the blogging world (or if you have a fireplace, Mr. Big Dubya is the mantel) and sent in a couple of holiday pics. Yes, it is gimmicky, but I have a fondness for gimmicks. So, why don't you park that disdain someplace, get over your bad selves and send a pic this way just for shits and giggles?

First - the Yule Log - what's a mantel without a roaring fire?


Now for the pics:

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December 12, 2005

You oughta be in pictures

I apologize for the dearth of posts lately - true to the stereotype that was dumped upon my generation in a book by Douglas Coupland and then bastardized by a media desperate to define us, I have been seriously slacking, both here and at my other gig. The end of the year can be a very crazy time, as anyone in a non-profit can tell you - I am trying to encourage some of my donors to make gifts at this time to help them out when tax season rolls around.

But, now that I'm here, I'll try and make the best of it, ok?

Let it snow, Let it snow, Let it snow
Friday brought the first real snow of the season. Some people I know took advantage of the day and either went sledding or worked from home. Our hero white-knuckle death-gripped it behind a plow in the morning and made his way to work. Yes, yes I could have remained in the comfort of my house and toiled away with a nice warm and crackling fire, but I have an annual review coming up so face time is good. Going to work, however, is itself a two-edged sword because by the time I got home that afternoon, there was 12+ inches of snow in my driveway and a sandy, caked up mess at the end from the plow. And, even though I am strong like bull, shoveling this time took its toll after two hours. Two hours! But, timing being everything (and mine is always piss poor) we are getting a snow blower this year - thank f'ing God - so we'll put an end to that.

Divo! Starring Little Dub
Saturday we took Little Dub to get photos done to mark his six months on this here earth. He was in a very good mood, slept on the way to the mall and looked adorable in his little outfit (honestly, this little guy dresses far better than his old man). Now, if you read Mrs. Big Dubya like I've told you all a thousand times, you'd know that Little Dub was by far the cutest kid in tha house that afternoon. Unfortunately, though, I think he knew it. He wouldn't crack a smile for nuthin'. Squeaky toys, raspberries, funny faces, acrobatics and Chevy Chase pratfalls couldn't muster even a grin. But, as soon as I picked him up, he was all smiles and looking for his agent. The pics came out really well - the little guy can really pull off the serious brooding actor look. I will have to work on keeping his ego in check, though. There's no way any son of mine is gonna be walking around saying, "All right, Mr. DeMille, I'm ready for my close-up."

Say Cheeeeeeeeese!
So, as I was toiling away at work on Friday, Mrs. Big Dubya successfully snapped the pic for our Christmas card. Yes, we used our Santa suit-clad child as a prop and stuck him in a wrapped box in front of the perfect tree. The photo was then e-mailed to Wal-Mart for a one hour conversion into 130 cards, which were then stuffed, addressed and finally mailed on Saturday. Yes, CroutonBoy you should be receiving your card soon which I want proudly displayed on your fridge! Of course I didn't do that, but, I do have a proposal. For the next 13 days, I am willing to be the Internets/Blogosphere refrigerator - I will display your Christmas photos for all to see. Now, I don't want pics of your cousin's girlfriend's niece. Much like Matt is posting family traditions on his site, I will post your child's holiday pic for everyone to marvel at (well, the 10-15 people who read this blog at least). Consider Mr. Big Dubya the family blog mantel. I will even post a picture of a roaring yule log to set the mood. Now, to get things started, here's one we didn't use (huh? No, I can't post the one we did use, then it wouldn't be a surprise for those receiving an actual card, duh):


So - there you have it. Send your pic (good, bad or absolutely freakin' hysterical) to mrbigdubya at gmail.com. I know, it's silly, but it might be fun - well, it could be if you at least join in.

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December 8, 2005

CokeBlakismoregooder


Coca-Colaannouncedyesterdaythattheyarecombiningtwoofthebestdrinksaround
-coffeeandCoke-allIhavetosayiswoo-hoo-thiscouldn'tarriveonthemarketsoonenough.
breath
MorecaffeineforeveryoneIsay.Yougotkids?You'llneverhavetoworryabouthaving
theenergytokeepupwiththem,that'sforsure!Sleep?Bah,whoneedsit?Sleep'sforamateurs.
Lotstodo?You'llhaveplentyoftimeifyoudon'thavetosleep.ImaginehavingyourChristmas
shoppingdoneinaday.Thenyoucouldwritethatnovelorscreenplay,workonworldpeaceor
justgetthattidyinguparoundthehousedone.ThepossibilitiesareendlesswithnewCokeBlak.
breath
Iamconfusedthough.IsitBlakpronouncedlike"Black?"OrisitBlakpronouncedlike"Blake?"
Thatlittlelineoverthe"a"confusesme.Ah,whocares?Morecaffeineismoregooderthat'swhat
Isay.Igotagonow.There'ssomedryawallIneedtoputupbeforeIputanewroofonthehouse.
Youneedanythingdone?Justemailme,okay?

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December 2, 2005

4382 hours ago

Six months ago this very day, Mrs. Big Dubya and I were looking into daycares, happily going about the business of the day, wholly unaware of the events that would transpire a mere 9 hours later. For those of you who have been following this blog, you know the story. For those of you who are new (and let me thank you for tuning in), I'll provide the shortest of summaries: Pain. Lots of pain. Ridiculously high blood pressure. Proteins in urine. Kidney failing. Swollen liver. Platelet count bottoming out. Dizziness. An unscheduled C-section. A new baby 31 days early (I know, because I blogged about his birth being a month away that morning). And, finally, an early morning trip to the NICU at UConn.

Now, here we are six months later and everything is hunky-dory. The little guy has been growing well and is catching up to where his development should be at this stage. It was certainly a grand entrance he made, but he has been keeping his image more low-profile since (except, of course, for the occasional pics his attention-seeking father posts).

Some birthday shout-outs: Mr. Big Dubya's Mom celebrates a birthday today and his much younger brother celebrates on Sunday. Also, a happy birthday to BIYF and Albert who celebrate yesterday and today respectively.


I am usually not this disheveled. Why are you looking at me anyway? Look at the little guy with the hat - he's far cuter than I.

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December 1, 2005

Oh, the places you will go!

I've never done a post on the keywords that bring people to Mr. Big Dubya. Then again, it used to be that the drummer for Def Leppard could count the number of hits I got on one hand...oops...sorry...that was certainly in very bad taste. But, things have been heating up as of late and since my posts are nearing 100, there are far more things available to come up on Google or Yahoo or MSN. So, let's look at some of the searches that have unwittingly brought these individuals to Mr. Big Dubya.

Syndrome HELLP Critical Care: This is actually something Mrs. Big Dubya and I are familiar with. However, this is not the place to get any relevant assistance. Though my heart does go out to these people, for it is not fun times. Oh, actually, it is interesting that the site es en espanol: Yahoo! Resultados de busqueda sobre syndrome HELLP critical care. Muy cool.

What is Dubya: That's a fine question, but how do you answer it? I'm a man, a father, a husband, a son, a brother, an uncle, a godfather, a friend, a blogger, a golfer - it goes on and on. What I do like about this search is that Mr. Big Dubya comes up numero uno. Woo-hoo!

Giada DeLaurentiis: Well, now. You must be disappointed to get my little portion of the internet. Sorry, no pics here. Well, none you'd like to see.

Little boy blue and the man on the moon: He needed the money. Oh, sorry, a little Andrew Dice Clay reference. Again, I like this because I come up first, though you'd think a site for Harry Chapin might be more appropriate. More hits for me!

Big Blue Eyes: Yes, I do have these, but I don't think I listed them in my profile.

Giraffe big eyes: Huh?

Lake Havasu spring break videos: Dude, just buy Girls Gone Wild.

Halloween transvestism: You talk about dressing up like a nurse one time! But, honestly, what the hell was this person thinking?

Wasn't that fun? I think I need to start going a little more blue - that will bring in some really funny shit.

Some random thoughts: Anyone watching CSI? What the hell is with Nick's 70s porno king moustache? That thing is just plain wrong.

My poor, poor Patriots. Still making a go of it, but with a decimated secondary and offensive line, things do not look so good. They'll still take the AFC East, but with competition like the Bills, Dolphins and Jets, I could probably put together a Pop Warner team that would do the same thing. Question: Does Peyton Manning currently wear the Dan Marino moniker "Best Qurterback to Never Win a Super Bowl?" If so, will he be able to shed it this year? Also, sorry, Metro, but how 'bout them 'Hawks? Though I do think young Eli is thisclose to being really, really good.

Stayed home with the little guy yesterday as he was a tad under the weather - he's still not 100%, but getting there. As he slept, I was able to get caught up on some of my television viewing. Invasion is getting creepier and creepier. Surface, you know the sea monster one, venturing toward the absurd. Still watching though. Lost gets better every week. If you didn't pay a lot of attention in school, the mythological, philosophical and Biblical references must be driving you crazy - keep Google on speed dial. Threshold's been moved to Tuesdays sounding the death knell - too bad, it's pretty good. Peter Dinklage is particularly humorous.

Shameless Plug: Make sure you check out DadCentric for our holiday favorites, gift suggestions and sundry other posts. You won't be disappointed.

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