Live Blogging NYE from the Couch

Don't say that we here in the Dubya household don't know how to live it up on New Year's Eve. We're having such a good time that I'm gonna live blog the remainder - right up to the ball drop at midnight.

Just to give you an idea of what kind of people the Dubyas are, let's give some background, okay? Pre children NYE's have been spent in Vail, Martha's Vineyard and Disney World. Post children we've spent them on the couch and...um...on the couch. To recap the weekend thus far: two children, both with fevers, lots of phlegm-filled coughing, some vomiting (on behalf of the children - I haven't drunk nearly enough yet), 15 loads of laundry, bed-making twice and a dogged determination to stay up until midnight to entertain you all.

Ok - let's get it underway:

8:00 p.m.: We're sitting on the couch watching VH1 Classic's 20 Greatest Videos of the 80's and I'm already pissed. Wanted Dead or Alive at #20? Jump at #19? Are you fuckin' kidding me? It's gonna be a loooong night.

8:15 p.m.: The neighbors are having a party. I'm jealous. They have lives.

8:25 p.m.: Michael Jackson at #16 - wonder how many times he'll be on this list.

8:30 p.m.: I can't stand the VW ads where the Jetta plows into another car - that, like, sucks.

8:32 p.m.: Uh-oh. We have gurgling. And with a quick lurch forward to a strategically placed towel, Mrs. Big Dubya has Little Dubyette positioned for the inevitable vomiting. Like a well-oiled machine we actually save the outfit. Yay, us.

8:43 p.m.: Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)? In the top 20 of the 80s? What asshat put this list together?

8:45 p.m.: WHY IS THERE NOTHING WORTH WATCHING ON TELEVISION? There have to be other people out there who are at the whim of sick children or don't have lives or both.

8:50 p.m.: Hmmmm. Rockit at #12. Okay. Semi-redeeming.

8:51 p.m.: Do I have a beer or just say fuck it and start drinking Jameson straight?

8:55 p.m.: Oooooo - Gleaming the Cube is on at 9:10 p.m. Maybe the night can be salvaged.

9:02 p.m.: Highlight: we have Cold Stone Creamery waiting for us. We are so living it up tonight. Beat that.

9:13 p.m.: What's your favorite Madonna incarnation? Is it the Borderline days? La Isla Bonita? Vogue? Music? C'mon, the world wants to know. Me? La Isla Bonita.

9:32 p.m.: Still trying to figure out the criteria for this list. Innovating or cutting edge? Or just whatever charted?

9:34 p.m.: Dear AOL: When are you going to realize how irrelevant you are? Do you think having Al Bundy do ads for your video site will drive traffic? Do you even get traffic anymore?

9:40 p.m.: Finally, one I agree with. Sledgehammer at #2.

9:45 p.m.: Thriller. Wow. Didn't see that coming. </sarcasm>

10:00 p.m.: Two more hours. Friends, I'm not sure I can continue blogging about the night -- re-pe-ti-tive.

10:25 P.M.: Chicago is losing to Green Bay 23-0? Can one more team screw me today?

10:30 p.m.: Oooooo - a Twilight Zone marathon. They never do these.

11:00 p.m.: Running out of gas. One hour left and I'm sitting here by myself - Mrs. Big Dubya has decided to salvage a decent night's sleep (or attempt one) and has gone off to bed. Maybe I'll have a cigar and call it a night.

11:40 p.m.: Carson Daly or Ryan Seacrest. Carson Daly or Ryan Seacrest. Pretty much a toss-up on who's the most devoid of talent.

11:45 p.m.: I hate being the type of person who starts something and won't quit until it's finished. Why am I still up?

11:48 p.m.: This has been dugg 138 times and has 32 comments? Wow, someone has less of a life than me.

11:55 p.m.: Five minutes. The excitement is palpable. To go to bed, that is.

11:58 p.m.: Imagine? I think even John Lennon would say STOP!

12:00 a.m.: HAPPY NEW YEAR! I'm going to bed.